Why is it when you can't stand up for yourself and you feel down and out and just plain sicker than a dog, people use that time to pick at you.  Constant picking instead of compassion and the stress involved in dealing with the picking is terrible.  I could not move to get out of bed this morning and during the middle of the night. Luckily my husband heard me and made sure I was okay and had me take a pain pill.  The morning before my dog heard me sobbing in the bathroom at the whee hours of the morning and woke him up to come help me.  This morning the pain in my abdomen went into my back and I literally couldn't move.  I had to push down hard on the spot and roll out of bed to then spend an horrendous amount of time in the restroom dying yet again.  Why when someone is dealing with this type of hell should anyone be but gracious to you.  The only people I can count on are the ones that live with me and see my anguish and reach out to help.  Everyone else has turned their backs.  I am saddened but some day I will be well and I hope I have the grace to turn to them and help.