My elderly mother gave me good advice.  She said I have to keep going to my appointments and hope that things will change so that they can treat my disease.  She said my family members deserve to have a healthy mother and wife.  In all reality she is right.  So I will go to my appointment next week and hope that something has changed. That in some miraculous way my numbers have somehow moved enough that I can get some treatment for this.  What does giving up on getting help prove to my loved ones, that when the going gets tough the tough give up.  I am one tough cookie sometimes and I will hold onto that!